May 3, 2024

My Angel on Earth...


is now in heaven.

Only a tiny little angel could fit in so perfectly with our big girls from day one.

Hailey was supposed to be the little lap dog that I always wanted.

Hailey chose the big girls instead and who could blame her.

My gorgeous girl brought us joy and happiness throughout her entire life.

Hailey has been the most devoted, tolerant, resilient and fun-loving pup.

She was the toughest little pup, hardly ever showing her pain.

I hope you felt all of the love that I have for you each and every day.  I loved creating fun activities for you, especially your golden eggs and our matching socks.

I had so many more fun things planned for us for when you got better. I'm so sorry that I couldn't make you better.

Thank you, Hailey for giving me all of your love and always being by my side. I love you with all of my heart. I'm so happy that you came into our lives. I have 15 years of fabulous photos to remind me of how happy you were.

May 2, 2024

I did all I could.

The next day, April 28th she didn't want to eat and for several days I did my best to tempt her with any food. I kept trying a ton of new foods recommended by our in home vet, Dr. Lynn and foods I knew she loved. Anything to get her to eat. If she liked the smell of it enough she would try it once and only a little bit. I tried Fresh Pet for small dogs which she ate for a few meals. She enjoyed baby lil' sticks for two meals and then refused. I seriously tried every food I could think of. For our food motivated Doxie who would eat anything that you handed her, we knew this was bad. She was slowing down. I was running out of foods that she would accept meds in. 

Our primary vet, Dr. Johnson was unavailable to give his recommendation on how to help her. The other vet in his office, without full blood work, gave us the option of placing her on a kidney food diet, providing subcutaneous fluids daily and adding Entyce to her med lineup to get her to eat. He stated that the kidney food is not really appetizing and that we would need to try a few probably.

Our in home vet, Dr. Lynn quickly did full blood work calling us on May 2nd with the results of multi organ failure. Add this on top of the undiagnosed brain tumor that caused those horrible seizures two months ago, a new heart murmur and pancreatitis issues.

We learned from our big girls and did not want our little Hailey going through testing and hospitalization where she would be scared and may pass away. We also didn't want to subject her to things where her quality of life afterwards would be worse. We made the gut wrenching decision to stop Hailey's suffering which is the best gift that we could ever give her.

What I struggle with the most is that Hailey was stable and had a great quality of life before surgery. I mean, right up to the day of surgery. She was happy and having fun. Every day I had fun activities planned for her that she absolutely enjoyed. During her first week of recovery, I had planned fun themes and golden egg toys were picked out and ready for when she was better.

The vet that we have trusted her whole life recommended it stating we needed to know what type of cancer it was for later in her life. After surgery and that horrible first night which was out of character for her, you could see she was getting back to normal. Once she was able to be on hard kibble again we resumed doing the things that she loved which she enjoyed. I believe whatever medical event took place within her on April 25th was the beginning of her decline. 

I was previously unaware and a google search taught me that, "Studies show that 0.9%–2.0% of patients that receive general anesthesia will develop kidney dysfunction 7–14 days after anesthesia." The vet office that performed her surgery said no, this could not be a factor. From my view over everything that I saw is that this was a big coincidence and the timeline fit for when Hailey started to decline. 

Along with this line of thinking, I do wonder if decompensation occurred. Meaning, "When a dog can no longer hide or mask the signs and symptoms of disease and suddenly becomes very obviously sick. Dogs have a talent and instinct for compensation, or hiding their symptoms, which is why they can seem to get sick “overnight” when they finally decompensate."

This post was written for my reference after we let Hailey go.

Apr 27, 2024


Stopping Rimadyl didn't help Hailey at all and Gabapentin made things so much worse. Yesterday at times she was unaware of where she was or where she was going, she slept more and her water intake increased continually. 

The side effects of Gabapentin hit Hailey hard today. My poor little Hailey was disoriented, frantically moving around our house crying and drooling. She refused to eat and was drinking a ton of water. I had given her a dose in the morning and stopped after that. We considered taking her to the ER but honestly didn't want to put her through a ton of tests to tell us what we already knew since she had just been to the vet. She finally settled down falling asleep in the corner of our den around 6:45 pm. I watched her like a hawk believing that this might be her last evening. To gently drift away in her sleep is what all pet owners wish for. As I watched her, I also was frantically searching the internet for any clue as to what could be going on with her.  Around 9:15 pm she woke up, looked around, came over to me looking for a snack. We thought we were beyond the worst of it when she willing ate her kibble. 

After we let Hailey go, I learned through a google search that I stumbled over that Gabapentin when given along with levetiracetam may increase side effects such as dizziness, drowsiness and confusion. I believe that may have been why Hailey had such a horrible reaction to it. The vet who prescribed both meds didn't tell us this was a potential. 

I'm certain that Gabapentin has helped pets out there. Hailey was on it before in liquid form for neck and back issues short term when she was younger and only experienced sleepiness. At the age of 15, I don't believe that Gabapentin was the best choice for her. I have not had an older pup (over the age of 11) who Gabapentin has helped. Lucie couldn't walk well or bend over to eat or drink and the second we took her off of it she developed severe edema. Addie wouldn't sleep at all and was anxious. I can personally attest that it causes dizziness, unease, sleeplessness/sleepiness, sleep paralysis (during the first two weeks), memory issues and electric shocks in your brain just to name a few. I have been on it for 10 months due to damaged nerves in my neck which are now healing. It makes me uncomfortable that Gabapentin is recommended so often for pets and people without any education on what to expect.

This post was written for my reference after we let Hailey go.

Apr 25, 2024

Shake it Off


I couldn't wait until Hailey was back on dry kibble so she could have some fun again. Hailey just loves posing and I love spending special time with her.

Our fun was short lived when she couldn't keep her kibble down. I knew something was not right. My husband was so very kind and got Hailey to Dr. Burney at VSNT lickety split . I thought it was low calcium, but no it was something else. Her kidney's are not functioning properly. They gave her an anti nausea shot along with subcutaneous fluids. He took her off of Rimadyl and started her on gabapentin hoping this is the issue. 

This started quickly on April 23. She refused her normal kibble so I was trying different things to get her the kibble nutrients along with something she would really want to eat. I used a rolling pin to break apart her low fat no taste kibble. My husband suggested mixing in some egg to spice it up. It was lick the bottom of the bowl good.

Since her surgery two weeks ago, she's not bounced back yet. And gabapentin, well, it comes with it's own side effects leaving Hailey terribly tired and limiting how often she wants to walk around. But not throwing up in the last 24 hours is wonderful for her. I'm focusing on Hailey's message of "shake it off". All paws crossed and praying that the medication change helps her kidney's get back on track.